Performed by Nazi Tyrants

Image for post
Image for post
Meme creator unknown — Pinterest

FACT:

According to the CDC, breast cancer is the second most common cancer among women in the United States. A yearly mammogram can help to detect breast cancer earlier, leading to less aggressive treatment, and a higher rate of survival. Most women typically begin having mammograms when they are around 40 years of age. If there is a history of breast cancer in your family, your doctor may suggest getting screened earlier.

EXPERIENCE:

I believe mammograms are performed by Nazi tyrants. Sure, they look all sweet and innocent, but are really sheep in wolves' clothing, based on their torture techniques.

Ladies, (and men, bless your heart if you’ve ever had to get a mammo), you know exactly what I’m talking about. …


by Doing Less of These Things

Image for post
Image for post
Photo by K8 on Unsplash

We can’t deny that 2020 was one to go down in the record books and not in a good way. People have been ready to kick it to the curb for a long time and rightly so.

Sometimes happiness can come from things we do less of or things we let go of. Instead of making resolutions that we typically drop early on and then feel like failures, let’s focus on ways we can improve and enrich our happiness on a more permanent basis. …


Securing our Safety

Image for post
Image for post
Photo by Chris Flynn on Pixabay

Conceal carry among women is increasing exponentially. Women are often targets of robbery, rape, domestic abuse, and typically stereotyped as the weaker sex. As the world continues to spiral into a more violent place, women are taking action for their self-protection. More and more are taking concealed carry classes and hitting the gun range often to be proficient should the need ever arise that they have to utilize their weapon.

With crime increasing rapidly in our country, from riots, lootings, mass shootings, and personal attacks, local gun shops have seen an increase in firearm sales recently and many from first-time buyers, both men and women. …


Blah blah blah…can I get a rain check, please?

Image for post
Image for post
Photo by Gage Walker on Unsplash

Fact: I hate rain. The only time I don’t is when I’m sick of watering the garden by the end of the summer. Then I don’t mind a shower…as long as it’s relatively short-lived and I don’t have to get out in it. Overnight rain is even better.

Some of my friends think rain is cathartic. I don’t know where I got those friends! I think rain is depressing. And it makes me lazy. Also, when it’s raining I want to eat like a big fat goat. I’ll go through the pantry and eat everything I can find. Aaaarrrggg…then I feel even more awful. …


Oh look…

Image for post
Image for post
Oh, look…a distraction.

Distraction is defined by the lack of ability to pay attention; lack of interest in the object of attention; or the great intensity, novelty, or attractiveness of something other than the object of attention.

You know how it is. You start cleaning up one room in the house, you carry something to another room to put in its proper place, and see the small pile of clothes lying on the bed you took out of the dryer an hour ago. …


Here I am.

Image for post
Image for post

The words that have always caused butterflies in my stomach are “Let’s go around the room and everyone introduce themselves.” I’d rather poke pencils in my eyes than introduce myself…well, not really…but you get the drift.

So here we are…here I am.

I live in beautiful North Carolina with my husband and two cats (both of whom think they are dying of hunger 99.9% of the time).

I love hiking, reading, traveling, wildlife, and, in general, all things nature. I’m typically not an inside kinda girl…I prefer to be outside (except in frigid winter) and especially in the warm weather months on our patio, sipping a glass of wine, and listening to some tunes. …


And Myself

Image for post
Image for post
Photo by Dan Cook on Unsplash

I wanted to be Bob Ross. He was an American artist/painter that mesmerized me when I watched his television show. His voice was so soothing and, more times than I care to admit, he put me to sleep while watching. He painted the most amazing landscapes with such ease and speed and I just knew I could somewhat replicate his paintings with no problem.

Yeah right. I crack myself up.

Way back in the early ‘80s, I bought paints, an easel, and brushes, and after trying to paint like Bob Ross for a month or so, and much fussing and cussing, I got rid of it all. My paintings resembled a 5-year-old’s work if even that good. …


Yes, please!

Image for post
Image for post

I’m not one to wait for a holiday to fix a favorite dessert. This recipe combines the best of both worlds — pecan pie and bread pudding — and is scrumpdelicious! I mean, who doesn’t like bread pudding or pecan pie? So why not throw them together and make magic????

I’m so happy to share this with you because I think it’ll become one of your favorites too.

Ingredients:

1 loaf of day-old French bread

2 ½ cups milk

1 cup half & half

4 eggs, slightly beaten

1 cup granulated sugar

1 Tbls vanilla flavoring

1/8 tsp salt

½ cup butter…

About

Carla Sharpe

Writer of various topics, stories, and life. Lover of all things nature. Come kick your feet up and sit a spell with me. Personal blog: www.parkitontheporch.com

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store